33 years
33 years ago tonight, Barry and I were celebrating our impending marriage on August 14th with a wonderful rehearsal dinner at his mother’s home. In those days, rehearsal dinners weren’t the huge things they are today. They were, rather, a nice dinner after the church rehearsal… sort of a thank you for being in the wedding party, or traveling to be with us, and helping us celebrate the most wonderful and meaningful time of our lives.
The problem was that everyone we knew and loved was at Flo and Joe’s home for a wonderful home-cooked feast… but Barry and me.
We were at a local hospital.
You see, Barry has Crohn’s Disease, and on August 13, 1976 he had a major attack. I won’t get into gruesome details here, but there was lots of blood. OK. That is gruesome. It began at St. Joseph’s Church, on Hope Street, in Providence and carried through to his parents’ home. At some point that night I made the decision to get him to the hospital. Pronto. We would be there until 2:00 am on our wedding day. There were many moments that night when I thought, “OK. This wedding isn’t happening.”
I remember the feast that Flo had prepared… the feast that we would miss. I remember the fear in Flo’s eyes as I insisted that we head to the emergency room. I remember the gracious hostess that she was, ready to put on her party in spite of her unthinkable fear for her son.
And that is why, tonight, as Barry and I headed out to dinner at one of our favorite restaurant/bars, I wore a necklace that had belonged to Flo. I wanted to honor Flo for her love, her devotion, her abominable spirit, her joy for family. I have the great privilege of being the keeper of Flo’s jewelry, and I spent a long time picking out just the right piece. Flo loved big jewelry… nothing expensive, but big. I decided on a piece designed in wood. I don’t know where she got this piece, but I remember that she wore it often. I put it on. But then I took it off. I wasn’t sure if it looked just right. Then I put it back on. And took it off. Then I put it back on and decided that it was perfect. It was Flo.
When Barry and I had settled at the bar of the restaurant, a young man next to me commented on how much he loved my necklace. I was stunned, to say the least. I told him of Flo and how I wanted to honor her tonight, and that led to a wonderful conversation about life and love and home and work and all kinds of beautiful things. When that young man left, a woman to our left commented on how much she loved my necklace. Stunned doesn’t even begin to describe my thought. I told her of Flo and our anniversary and we talked of marriage and love and life and kids and her being an auntie. All because of Flo’s necklace.
What makes this necklace even more powerful is that I also wore it to the swim meet that 3 of our grandchildren were in this past weekend. I wanted to have something of Flo at that meet, knowing how much she would have loved seeing her great-grandchildren swim. It was Taylor who asked me about my necklace. I told her it had been Nana-Flo’s, and I explained that I had chosen to wear it as an amulet of sorts… a symbol of Nana-Flo and her great love and extra luck. Taylor asked if she could put it on, and of course I said, “Yes.” Taylor held it in her hands and told me that it smelled like Nana Flo. It was one of the happiest moments of my life to know that Flo was there… and that her first great-grandchild could feel her, too.
33 years. 33 years ago tonight, I remember sitting in the emergency room and wondering if I would be a bride the next morning. I would be. With lots of medication and a spirit just like his Mom’s, Barry would be waiting for me at the other end of the aisle of that beautiful church on Hope Street.
Hope got us there. Hope sent us these 33 wonderful years. And hope is what we will always have with our angels surrounding us. I can only wish this happiness and joy and love of family that we have been blessed with all these years to everyone on earth.
OK. That wedding did happen! Happy, Happy Anniversary, Honey! I loved you, then. I love you now. I always will… !!
I love you more.
Happy Anniversary!! I could listen to you talk about Flo all day, Sharon. I love the way you love her. I pray that there will be a day when my son will marry a wonderful lady who will love me and cherish me (and I her!) as much as you did Flo.
I also have to say that I see so much of each of your girls in you in that first picture! Just beautiful!
Thanks for sharing this story. Helps us all to appreciate what we have. Happy Anniversary!
We just celebrated ours on August 11th – we are a blended family so when we got married it was my husband, his two children and me – a family cirlce wedding – it was amazing.
Once again, you remind us what’s important. Happy Anniversary to you and Barry.
Yes, the necklace is beautiful and so are you. You look radiant wearing Flo’s necklace.
Once again, you tug at your readers’ hearts with your beautiful and loving story telling.
Barry’s and your love is beautiful, too.
Happy Anniversary, dear friends.
I love this story. As stressful as it must have been, what a true test of the “in SICKNESS and in health” part of a marriage. Your relationship with Barry is such an inspiration to me, because after all these years, you still both have so much humor and love for one another.
Happy Anniversary to the two people who I aspire to be like… I love you both more.
xoxo
- Audrey
Happy Happy Anniversary you lovely couple you!!! Here’s to many more years of happiness and adventures!
Happy Anniversary to one of my favorite couple of people.
What a great story! Thank you for sharing. Happy Anniversary! Read your twitter bio…you’re an inspiration. Good luck with that triathlon.
Happy Anniversary Sharon & Barry! We celebrated our 35th on Aug. 2. I love the necklace and how you include Flo in every aspect of your life. She lives on. Crohn’s Disease runs on my husband’s side of the family as well. I know how sick a person can get. What a story! Oh, and by the way, What a sexy lookin’ back in that wedding gown…great choice!
p.s. My hubby’s tux looked just like Barry’s in the 70′s.
Happy Anniversary to two of the sweetest people that I have been lucky enough to meet. I hope Dom and I are as loving as you two are as the years pass.
A beautiful bride, her handsome groom. I can still see you walking down the aisle to the lovely sounds of the hammered dulcimer. You were adorned in a simple but lovely eyelet dress—with a surprise—it was backless, a unique touch in those days.
Yes, the church on Hope Street was the perfect spot for you and Barry to begin your life together, then feasting with family and friends on the bay in Warren.
In the picture above, we can see the love and devotion pouring from Barry’s eyes and heart.
Congratulations on thirty-three years of wedded bliss. May you be blessed with many more.
…and of course, we followed suit two months later!
I second Audrey – if I can be like you guys someday, I can’t imagine hoping for much more.
Many, many congratulations and best wishes for at least another 33 beautiful years!
Another great post…Taylor also told me that the necklace “smelled” like Nana Flo that day…I thought of her tonight when we at at Wright’s…she loved that place too. Hope you had a GREAT dinner last night!
I love Barry’s comment because it is what Tom says to me all the time.
What a beautiful story of love and faithfulness that almost didn’t happen. That would have a tragedy. Your 33 years together have produced wonderful, intelligent children and grandchildren.
Happy Anniversary and many more filled with love, memories and happiness.
Congrats on 33 years of marriage!