I know I gave my parents some challenging parenting moments, especially during my teenage years, but we have always had an incredibly strong connection. They have always stressed the importance of spending time together as a family… traveling together… trusting each other… sharing together… laughing together…

Doing activities together is how people bond. It’s how parents teach – and learn from – their children.

And as Bonding over Beauty author Erika Katz explains, it’s how mothers can foster self-esteem, confidence, and trust with their daughters.

My mom and I had the pleasure of meeting Erika last month, and I was so excited for the opportunity to review her book.

Reading through the chapters, I found myself nodding my head in agreement on numerous occasions. Written for moms of tweens and teens, Erika offers fabulous tips for building a bond that will last a lifetime. Hair care, makeup, shaving, proper hygiene, a girl’s changing body during puberty… these are all topics that daughters are going to have questions about, and the advice in Bonding over Beauty is real and practical for moms.

Activities like shopping for skin care products, curling or flat ironing hair, doing at-home manicures… these are all perfect opportunities for starting a dialogue with your daughter about anything from fun topics to those sticky “grown up” issues that you need to address.

I can speak from first-hand experience in saying that some of the best conversations my mom and I have had together over the years have happened while we’re cooking together, doing our makeup together for an event, working out together, or, believe it or not, while my mom tweezes my eyebrows!

Erika’s advice is lighthearted but not suger-coated. She tackles everything from mascara to menstruation – all the topics tha daughters need to talk about with their mothers. Each chapter includes Bonding Activities to give ideas on how to, well, bond over beauty!

I recommend Bonding over Beauty to moms of tweens, teens, soon-to-be tweens and teens – and even adults!

Yesterday was one of those life calendar days for me.

My Mom had surgery scheduled for early yesterday morning.  I was awake all the previous night.  Tossing.  Turning.  Trying to turn off the thinking.

I got out of bed at 4:00 am.  I turned on my television.  I got dressed.  I drove to our local Dunkin’ Donuts for an iced coffee.  I read a bit of our local newspaper.

I called my Mom, as she had asked me to do, at 5:30 am.

No answer.

Hmmmmmm, I thought.  This is unusual.  My Mom never oversleeps, never mind on an important morning like this one.

Truth be told, I wasn’t hmmmmm casual.  I was in immediate panic mode from the second ring on.  My Mom truly does not oversleep.  EVER.  She has a system of 200 backups to prevent this from happening.  She’s a wake-up genius.

I was supposed to pick up my Mom at her senior complex at 6:00 am.  She was scheduled for pre-op at 6:30 am.  The hospital is a good 15 minutes from her home.

I got in my car.  I called my Mom’s number every 2 minutes.  She never picked up.  I broke every traffic law along the way.

That’s not a U-turn?  Oops.

I know my Mom wears hearing aids and that she cannot hear the phone’s ring when doesn’t have them on.  But it was very unlike my Mom to NOT BE UP, never mind NOT HAVE HER HEARING AIDS ON.

Was that just a red light?  Oops.

As my Mom’s complex came into view, I saw NO LIGHTS from her windows.  I drove right up to the front, rather than into the visitors’ parking area.

Oh, this is a Fire Lane?  Oops.

I don’t have a front door swipe key to my Mom’s complex, but everyone knows me and I’ve NEVER had a problem getting in.  I do have an apartment key.

Problem.  It was 5:53 am.  No-one was up.

But there was THE PAPERBOY.  Or MAN.  The saint with the orange box loaded with newspapers.  He didn’t even let me ask if I could sneak in with him… one look at my frantic face was enough.

I tore up the elevator.  Ran down the hallway.  Unlocked my Mom’s door.  To find her SOUND ASLEEP.

NOW IT WAS 5:55.  AM.

The next few minutes were a whirl of mother/daughter with the daughter as the mother.  Go to the bathroom. Not those pants.  Where’s your shirt?  You don’t need a bra.  You’re going to be naked in 10 minutes.  No lipstick.  I said NO LIPSTICK.  You don’t need socks.  I’ll bring socks later.  WE HAVE TO GO!

We sprint-marathoned it to the elevator, outside and to my illegally parked car.

“You parked here,” my Mom asked, shocked.

I didn’t answer because I was too busy breaking more traffic laws on our way to the hospital.

Fortunately, Jane was meeting us at the hospital… so I whipped right up to the entrance and sprinted my Mom to where she belonged while Jane parked my car.

We arrived in pre-op at 6:32 am.

Yes, I do deserve an Olympic medal for this new category:  Pre-op Marathon

The edge was off the surgery a bit with all the craziness of the early morning and everything went beautifully from then on.  Jane and I stayed with my Mom until we kissed her good-bye as she was whisked off to the OR.  I choked back big, giant daughter tears until the sounds of the wheels were gone.

Then I waited.  Jane had an appointment, so I waited alone.  Barry texted that he had left a lunch in my car… and that made me cry.  Barry showed up, waited with me awhile and then kissed me as he headed off to work.  That made me cry.  The agonized faces of the other people in the surgical waiting room made me cry.

Not CRYING crying.  Filled eyes and tissues and heartache and the unknown kind of crying.

One by one, surgeons came to speak with the waiting people.  One by one, at least yesterday, the news was good.  Smiles.  Hugs.  Handshakes.

And 2 hours after I kissed my Mom on her way to the OR, my Mom’s surgeon appeared.  She was smiling.  She spoke.  I got the basics.  I’m a detail person, but this time I just got the basics.  My Mom was going to experience some major pain.  The pain would be managed.  Re-assessments would be made day-to-day.

My Mom was fine.  She was in Recovery.  She would stay there until a hospital room was ready. That’s what I heard loudly and clearly.

I waited a couple of hours, checking in with the wonderful, wonderful nurses in Recovery by phone.  I was told that I could call as often as I wanted… which was beyond wonderful.

At noon, one of the nurses said, “Why don’t you head home, have some lunch, so some errands.  We’ll call if we need you.”

I live 5 minutes from the hospital.  I hesitated with the leaving thing… but knew that Jane was working at my home.  I needed Jane.  I needed lunch.  I had whipped up a huge pot of homemade chicken soup the night before.  I left the hospital and headed home.

Jane and I ate.  We told wonderful GrandmaRita stories.

And we went for a run.  Well, first I called my Mom’s Recovery nurse, who told me to go for a run!

The short run with Jane’s company made me breathe easier.  Feel better.  Appreciate my relief & happiness even more.

But it would be Jane’s dog Tansy who would know what exactly I needed to actually bust out the joy after a very stressful day…

After our run, Jane popped in one of my favorite GAIAM dvd’s… Power Yoga Strength with Rodney Yee.

I had lots of emails to get out to family and friends about my Mom, so I couldn’t join in.

But within a minute or so, Jane whispered, “Mom. Come see this.  But tip-toe.”

I did.

This is how Tansy busted out all the joy of a stressful day, as only a doggie can do…

Tansy-girl!

But not only did she want to make me laugh, she was showing off her Yoga moves with her Mommy and Rodney Yee…

OK. OK.  Maybe Tansy remained in her own “UPWARD DOG” position the entire time, but she did it with a great big, all-knowing, joyous smile…

And man… did she make Jane and me laugh with great joy at her great aplomb!

Yes, sometimes it just takes a smiling doggie doing Yoga to make one of those life calendar days all better.

(And I promise to go back to my law-abiding driving.)

I hope everyone had a fabulous 4th! We are living right on the parade route in Bristol, RI, home to the longest continuously-running Independence Day parade in the country, so we had a big pahty. It was so much fun!

Also fun? Wedding planning is in full swing! Brian and I have a date, a church, a wedding party and a venue – Bristol Yacht Club. This will be our view on July 14, 2012:

The yacht club has special meaning for a few reasons. First of all, it’s where Brian learned to sail and where he spent a lot of time sailing as a youngster.

It also overlooks Bristol Harbor, on which Brian and I had our first date on September 1, 2009.

September 1, 2009, just before Brian took me and Tansy around the harbor on his boat

When we walked in to Bristol Yacht Club to look at it as a potential wedding venue, it just felt right for both of us.

I’m looking forward to planning the rest of our wedding as all the details come together for our big day – just a little over a year from now!

… Brian is a total romantic.

And that is the reason I already have the wedding band I will wear when we get married – and I actually have been wearing it for over a year.

You see, when Brian was a young chap of about 8 years old, he was vacationing in Miami with his family and he found a ring. It was a simple white gold band, and in his sentimental little heart he thought it would be the perfect thing to give to the girl he wanted to marry someday.

And so he kept it… for about 17 years. Then last May he gave it to me. He didn’t call it a “promise ring,” per se, but in a way that’s what it was. It wasn’t an engagement ring… it wasn’t time for a proposal just yet… but it was a way to let me know that I was the one he had saved the ring for all those years.

I have worn the ring since he gave it to me (prompting many questions from people as to the meaning behind it, as I usually wore it on my ring finger), and then a few weeks ago, before Brian proposed, he suggested that I use the ring as my wedding band when we got married.

I liked the idea. I had been wondering where I would wear it when Brian and I did get engaged and then married, so it was a perfect solution.

Then my mom and I were shopping in local jewelry and gift shop, Muse, for a new wedding band for my dad (his broke after nearly 35 years!). When I was telling the owner that I planned to wear the ring as my wedding band, she suggested adding diamond chips to it.

I loved this idea because the ring means so much to both me and Brian, and this will allow me take it from being a “promise ring” of sorts to a beautiful wedding ring.

(And thanks to my friend, Krissy, I have an idea what I want it to look like – this Tiffany ring.)

So that takes care of my wedding band… now we just have to figure out the rest of the wedding plans!

In the almost 5 months that we’ve been working with Puristics as spokespeople, we at Mom Generations have had the chance to become quite acquainted with the products.

Friends have asked me about Puristics, naturally, and if I really do love the products. And the answer is yes, of course! I would never promote products I didn’t use myself and fully endorse.

I know my mom is the one who mostly talks about the anti-aging skin care line, but I use the Daily Anti-Aging Lotion and Revitalizing Eye Cream and LOVE them. Audrey mostly talks about the baby care products, but I have used the Diaper Cream when changing my nephew Henry’s diaper and definitely plan to use the baby products when I have kids of my own.

And, of course, I’ve talked about why I feel good using Puristics’ feminine protection products (this is the point in the conversation when I encourage the men to exit stage left)… but I wanted to let some of my friends use the products, too.

Like I’ve said before, feminine care products aren’t something we women sit around chatting about on a regular basis. I have never before said to one of my friends, “You just have to try this tampon!”

But now that I use Puristics and I know what goes in to making the feminine care products (or more specifically, what doesn’t go in to them – cellulose, rayon, perfumes, superabsorbent materials, plastic, or other petrochemical byproducts) – I do kinda have that, “You have to try these” feeling about the products.

So I’ve distributed Puristics tampons, ultra thin pads, and pantiliners to some of my friends over the last few weeks. The results were pretty much as I expected… let’s be honest, not many people get overly excited about feminine protection products, regardless of the materials used to make them. I wasn’t expecting anyone to say, “It made having my period so much more enjoyable!” – and no one did.

What I did think they’d say – and what they did say – is that it made them feel good to know they were using products that had no potentially harmful chemicals – and that they were pleasantly surprised that the Puristics products were just as comfortable and had the same amount of absorbency as the products they were used to using.

I’d like to think I’m a pretty credible person (as are my mom and Audrey), and I’d also like to think that that’s one of the reasons we looked like a good fit to be Puristics spokespeople.

I was happy to hear my friends’ reactions to using Puristics. I am a Puristics fan and I’m glad they are now, too!

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Disclosure: We at Mom Generations are spokespeople for Puristics, but I would not write about or endorse the products unless I used and loved them!

For the last few months, I have been a bit sporadic with my fitness routine. Yes, a few injuries have gotten in the way of me exercising as much as I’d like, but at times my efforts have just been more focused on other things.

However, there’s always the opportunity to re-prioritize, and that’s what I’ve been doing lately. Now that the weather is finally getting nicer and more conducive to actually enjoying outdoor activities, I’ve been getting out on my bike and even trying to get some walk/runs in (I’m trying to ease back into all running so as to help heal my arch tendonitis.)

I also began really following Rhode Island fitness trends, deals and news a few months ago, and keeping track of everything on a Rhody Fitness Facebook Page and Twitter profile, which has kept me entrenched in the Rhody Fitness scene.

Keeping my ear to the ground on the fitness goings-on in the state led me to finding out about a group ride happening on Friday, May 13 at the new Eastern Mountain Sports location in Warwick, RI. I was so game!

First of all, I’m a big fan of EMS and frequented the store in the old location, the Garden City Shopping Plaza in Cranston, RI (near where I used to live). I was also psyched to get to know the people working at the new EMS, as well as other cyclists in the area. It’s always great to find new people with whom to ride.

There were about 12 cyclists in the group, many of whom were part of the EMS executive team (including CEO Will Manzer), and it was a beautiful afternoon, just perfect for a ride. We took off from the Warwick store and spent some time on the roads around Warwick, Cranston, Coventry and West Warwick (read: lots of hills).

Two years ago when I was really in the best shape of my life, training like a fiend for my first marathon and then my first Half Ironman, I would have been able to tackle those hills like a champ. But yesterday? Well, let’s just say I it was quite a workout. And you know what? It was probably just what I needed. As difficult as it was to not be at the front of the pack, it made me want to work harder to get there. I feel like I held my own with the other riders, but I know I can work harder to to get myself in better riding shape. Luckily, it’s only the start of the season!

Anyway, I wanted to thank EMS for a great ride. From my conversations with the folks on the ride, it seems that EMS in Warwick will be planning group rides and other events to take place at their store. I will be sure to keep everyone informed! (RhodyFitness.com is being developed, but that is where the events will be listed once the site is really up and running. Until then, keep following along on Facebook and Twitter!)

But then as I began to watch the wedding recaps throughout the day, my tune changed. The tradition and formality and splendor that marked the occasion intrigued me. Kate looked so lovely and gracious and refined. She and William seemed genuinely happy and in love. It was quite magnificent.

I also found myself looking at the wedding from the point-of-view as a hopefully soon-to-be bride. I am pretty sure that I have Brian backed into a corner a proposal from Brian is on its way, and I have begun thinking about Our Wedding.

Maybe I’m getting a bit ahead of myself (there is no ring on my finger yet, after all), but I’ve always loved weddings and just naturally find myself thinking about wedding dresses and wedding colors and wedding locales and… well, you get the point. So I just go with it.

I have been married before, of course, and it was one of those $uper Big Wedding$. So I’m not expecting The Wedding of the Century this time around. It will, however, be Brian’s first wedding (to my knowledge!!). What does this mean? That a beautiful, elegant, tasteful celebration – without breaking the bank – would be ideal.

So when I was invited by IKEA to take part in an interactive online webinar focused on bridal design ideas and inspiration, I jumped at it. The webinar was called IKEA Takes a Walk Down the Aisle: Tips, tricks and trends for a beautiful, affordable wedding and beyond. Umm… yes, please!

Our experts were Janice Simonsen, an IKEA Design Spokesperson, and Laurie Satran, an IKEA employee and bride-to-be. They walked us through the bridal shower, wedding and nesting (or “after the honeymoon”) trends that are influencing current designs and I was on the edge of my seat. Because I will be a bride soon-ish (again, hopefully)!

(No pressure, Brian!)

Obviously the IKEA experts touched on the fact that the economy is affecting the way wedding plans are taking shape right now. As they said, it’s making people ask, “What’s really important to me?” when looking at their budgets. These days brides and grooms are paying approximately 40% of their wedding costs themselves. That can be a huge chuck o’ change. Also? About 40% of couples go over their anticipated budget. Yikes!

Typically the bride and groom don’t pay for the bridal shower, but like the wedding itself, the cost to put on a shower can creep up quickly. The IKEA experts had some awesome, money-saving ideas to create an affordable shower without sacrificing style.

How about an intimate, elegant shower at someone’s house, for example? You could incorporate the wedding colors in the shower setting to add a nice touch. And you can create an atmosphere that is personalized to the bride (and groom, if it’s a Jack and Jill shower) by including photos of the couple in the décor. Photo frames like these Finlir Frames could hold fun photos on tables or elsewhere at the shower.

And then there’s the wedding itself. The Main Event.

The IKEA experts emphasized the importance of making sure it’s your day… that it reflects your personalities and what you want it to say about you as a couple.

One particular trend they mentioned, and that I have seen implemented, is using cupcakes instead of big wedding cakes. It’s a way to keep things casual, personal and friendly… and it can keep costs down.

It is also possible to decorate the ceremony and reception beautifully and at great price. One suggestion the experts offered was the use of lanterns.

I love the look of lanterns, and as the experts pointed out, they range in styles to work with themes from casual to formal. As Janice said, light addds sparkle and elegance to any ceremony. They are also multi-functional, as they can be lined down the aisle at the ceremony, then used on the tables or hung in the trees at the reception.

Another lighting idea I loved was the use of solar powered lighting. Guess what? LED can be elegant! Check these out:

How lovely would these Solvinden lights look hanging from trees or a tent at the reception? What’s more, they charge in the sun and when the battery is fully charged, will give full light for approximately 12 hours.

But most importantly, the IKEA experts stressed, is to make your wedding special by making it yours.

Finally, the IKEA experts went into detail about “hiving,” or the trends surrounding nesting. People are making their homes the hub of their activity, opting, for example, to have dinner at home rather than dining out, or having a movie night in rather than spending money at the theater.

So the home is more important than ever. Brian and I are in the process of looking for a home right now, but in the meantime we are moving into an apartment June 1, as we want to be able to take the time to find exactly what we want in a house (or as close to it as possible).

In creating our home together, it will be important for us to each add our own personal touches, which, the experts say, can present a challenge. We will have to take a look at what we both have and figure out a way to unify and join everything.

One great tip they had is to purchase any new items (like furniture) in neutrals in order to work around the other items that each of us are bringing into the home. Then we can use the splashes of color to add impact and create a common ground. (By the way, the IKEA experts say that the hot colors this spring and summer are oranges, yellows, blues and purples.)

Another challenge will be sharing storage space, especially in our bedroom, bathroom and kitchen, as the apartment we’re moving into does not have large rooms. The experts suggests using as much vertical space as possible in the bathroom to create extra storage. IKEA’s RÖNNSKÄR series is perfect for this.

To maximize space in the kitchen, something portable and multi-functional is key. This FÖRHÖJA kitchen cart is definitely on my wish list.

I was really happy to get the inside scoop on the money-saving tips and trends from this webinar that I can actually use. It made me even more excited to start the wedding planning process (I know, I know… patience is not one of my virtues). I learned a lot and am excited to incorporate some of the tips into our future wedding plans and into our little nest!

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Disclosure: I was not paid by IKEA for my participation in this webinar, though I will receive a IKEA BLOSSANDE Coffee accessory set as a token of appreciation.

Each week throughout 2011 I will share how I am giving back somehow, whether it’s by offering my resources, my time, my talents or my support.

Giving back doesn’t have to be on a grand scale. And doesn’t have to be about money.

Oftentimes charities, organizations, causes and foundations need support beyond donations. And that’s what I’m going to try to focus on.

I will be sharing what I’m doing each week; perhaps you, too, will be inspired to give back.

Together we can make a difference.

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52 Weeks of Giving: Weeks 17 & 18

I went to high school with a guy who, in recent years, has not only inspired me with his fitness and athletic accomplishments, but for his civic-mindedness and desire to make the world a better place. Along with his wife, he is the co-founder of LIFEcycle, Inc., a RI-based non-profit organization that promotes healthy, active living. Team LIFEcycle supports local healthcare by hosting fundraising events directed at meeting a particular need. I was supposed to participate as a team member in an upcoming TLc event, the Ragnar Relay, but had to withdraw due to injury. I am going to volunteer as a van driver, but I also wanted to show my support for LIFEcycle financially, so for Week 17 I donated money to this worthy cause.

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The storms and tornadoes that ripped through Alabama were horrific. It devastated me to see and read the first-hand accounts of people who were in the path of the destruction, like this post at 5 Minutes For Mom. Thankfully, the post offered ideas for people like me who felt the need to help somehow but wanted to make sure that our contributions were going to the right places. For Week 18 I donated food through the Amazon Wish List set up by Christian Service Mission. On this list are desperately needed items for those families who have lost everything. From 5 Minutes For Mom: All you have to do is purchase items from this wish list, and they’ll be shipped directly to the mission, who will immediately deliver them to the dozens of communities that have been devastated by these tornadoes.

So we were excited for the chance to try out even more 4all gear. Here we are on the way to the gym in our new workout outfits from the London (on me) and New Orleans (on Mom) collections:

With it being springtime, the weather in these parts can range from brisk to balmy, so it’s nice to have some versatility in terms of workout wear. Beyond that, these clothes are just so classically stylish. I love the pretty colors and cool prints in these collections.

I’m wearing:

London Jo-Polo

London Knit Athletic Pants

Mom is wearing:

New Orleans Jo Sleeveless Polo with Mosaic Print

New Orleans Knit Bermuda Shorts

4all offers the kind of workout clothing that actually looks like it belongs both on and off the court, so to speak… or as the case may be: the track, or the golf course or the rock climbing wall!

Want to rock some 4all gear for your workouts!?

4all is generously giving one Mom Generations reader one of the clothing pieces we’re wearing here!

**To enter to win, leave us a comment here telling us which is your favorite piece – the London Jo-Polo, the London Knit Athletic Pants, the New Orleans Jo Sleeveless Polo with Mosaic Print or the New Orleans Knit Bermuda Shorts.

We will randomly choose a winner on Saturday, May 14, 2011 at 5 PM EST**

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Disclosure: As a Team 4all member, we received the apparel pictured above, but all opinions are ours!

Audrey is my only dog-less sibling, but I have my two dogs and Audrey’s husband’s sisters both have dogs, so Audrey’s boys have lots of 4-legged cousins in their lives. My nephews have always been very gentle and loving to my dogs, and vice versa.

I always try to remind my nephews that the dogs are special members of our family. So I love when I find companies doing the same thing through their products.

Like AnnieWear. These animal-themed baby and kids gifts were inspired by an adorable rescue puppy named Annie, so naturally the company caters to people who love pets and kids (that would be me!). And actually, like me, the founders of AnnieWear are loving aunts with no human kids of their own!

AnnieWear offers tons of unique gifts for newborns, infants, toddlers and kids up to size 7. The gifts include clothing, accessories, toys, blankets and much more.

I was able to review the super cute 100% cotton AnnieWear original “Woof!” tee, which teaches how to say ‘Woof!’ in seven different languages.

Look how sweet my almost-3-year-old nephew Henry looks in it!

AnnieWear’s gift items and original products are absolutely charming. And an added bonus? A portion of the proceeds goes to animal rescue charities, so you can feel even better about sharing these wonderful gifts with the ones you love.

Head on over to AnnieWear to see what else they have, and to meet the real Annie through adorable pictures and videos. It’s clear she gets a lot of love!

And save 15% off your purchase with promo code BLOG2011 at checkout!