The “I Can’t” List and Being OK with it.

On Monday I spent about 2 hours on the phone with one of my blogging friend’s Danielle Smith from Extraordinary Mommy. She recently wrote a post, “You want Honest? I’ll give you honest” that just really hit home with me and so many other moms.

Well, Danielle… you inspired me!

As I’ve gotten to be older (ahem… the wise age of 33), and been working a mile a minute over the last year and a half, and trying to raise a family of 4 boys, I’ve realized that I have had a problem with saying 2 words – “I can’t.”

They’re just 2 words. I. Can’t. But I have trouble saying them. And if I do, I feel bad. And mostly this just has to do with my personal life… I’m so busy with work, that every single second I’m not working, I want to be with my kids and my husband. For me, it’s been my real-life friendships that have taken the biggest hit. I used to have a lot of free time to be able to do things – mommy meet-ups, playdates, workout dates, dinners, movies, you name it! My life has changed a lot in the last year, and I worked hard to get to this point, but with all of this… the balance in my life shifted. I had to…

I can’t be in 3 places at once.
I can’t travel that weekend because it’s William’s 1st swim meet.
I can’t make the PTO meeting that night.
I can’t meet up for movie night.
I can’t make that deadline because I’ll be away at a conference.
I can’t fold the laundry because I’m too tired right now.
I can’t go for drinks, I have a Twitter Party.
I can’t host a birthday party at home, we MUST have it somewhere else (have you seen this house?).
I can’t come over for dinner because I just want to be with the kids and Matt.
I can’t join the book club.

These are a few of my I can’ts…

And you know, I’m OK with them.

I really, really am.

About Audrey

Audrey McClelland has been a digital influencer since 2005. She’s a mom of 5 and shares tips on her three favorite things: parenting, fashion and beauty. She’s also a Contemporary Romance Author.

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  1. 9.23.11
    Rachel Blaufeld said:

    Audrey – what is it about us women that we have so much trouble with “I can’t” it’s a real problem for me and I feel so much guilt over saying it. I agree personal friendships have been hit the hardest for me….but I think that is life is continually shifting. Rachel

  2. 9.27.11

    First of all…. it was so good to talk to you. Second…. I love this because I have found that saying, “I can’t” is so hard…. I always feel as though I’m supposed to qualify it or say, “I’m sorry but….” with it. And the truth is…”I can’t.” should be good enough. Perfection, my friend. xoxo

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