Yesterday’s tragedy unfolded slowly for me.

We were having a beautiful time with the boys at a local nursery in Rhode Island checking our gorgeous flowers and plants for our gardens. The boys were playing and laughing and chasing each other around. Matt was in gardening heaven. And I was literally just taking in the sights of my boys all happy and peaceful.

Then I heard my phone ring around 3PM.  For one of the first times ever, I just let it ring. I was having such a great time with the boys, I didn’t want work to get in the moment… I figured whomever it was could be called back in 30 minutes or so. But then my husband’s phone immediately rang. He took a quick look to see who it was, “It’s my Dad… I’ll call him when we’re on the way home.” I quickly checked my missed call to see who it was, too –  it had been my father-in-law. I love my father-in-law to pieces, but he rarely calls me.  Let’s put it this way… when he called, I immediately thought something had to be wrong.  I don’t know what made me, but I instantly went to CNN.com to see if anything had happened. I just had a feeling, and then I saw the news feed… 2 explosions had gone off at the Boston Marathon.

WHAT!?

Are you serious?

I had just wished all my friends who were running in the marathon good luck on my Facebook page that morning.  2 explosions!? FOR REAL!? Was everyone OK??

And then I logged onto Facebook and my news feed was filled to the brim with alerts.  I had emails and Facebook messages from friends asking me if my mom or sister or brothers had run the marathon and people just making sure we were all OK. Yes… we were all fine, but were others!? My heart just sank.

As soon as we got home I turned the TV on and was glued to it until news of the 8 year-old child spread. It was at THAT point I had to turn it off. I couldn’t handle that news. It was too close to home. It was too real. It was too raw. The video footage. The photos. It was horrible to see… especially knowing Boston is an hour and 10 minutes from my home.

My oldest sons knew something was going on because of all the phone calls we were getting from friends and family. I explained to them as best as I could without scaring (pardon my french) the crap out of them. I just didn’t want kids on the baseball field or at school telling them their rendition. I would prefer for them to hear it from me and my husband.

It was my Alex who asked the most innocent question of all… “But why would someone want to hurt so many people?” I wish I could answer that question for my son. I just don’t know why.

Seriously… what is going ON!?

My hearts and my prayers are going out to all those affected yesterday.