A house of contagion in which all clothing “washing instructions” go ignored –

A house of contagion in which all clothing “washing instructions” go ignored –

I’m a very careful “laundress.”

I follow the specified directions on those tiny tabs with the tiny print that most times are sewn into some remote part of the clothing item by someone who laughs all day long at the images of people like me trying to find those tiny tabs with the tiny print in order to carefully launder my clothing. Yep.

I was taught “laundering” by the best when I was young.

My Mom.

My Mom grew up in a family, a household with 6 kids, 4 of them girls. My Mom was the second child, oldest girl. Things were tight with money and clothing went a very long way. Hence, laundering was a careful, meticulous, instruction-following process.

My Mom, at 91, is to this day a careful laundress. She still does, Lord help us, *”hand washing.” Well, I do all of her laundry now… but she is still very careful to instruct me, you know, on things like “cold, delicate, dry flat” vs “warm, tumble medium.”

*I do not hand wash.

I do follow Mom’s directions (mostly because I know that she will know if I don’t), but every-once-in-awhile I sneak in an “express, hot, tumble dry high” when I feel that germs are involved.

Confession: I am a germophobe.

When germs are involved in any laundry process, all laundering instructions go south. Bye-bye.

This is when those tiny tabs become meaningless to me. I’m happy they’re hidden by that sadistic seamstress. I head to my washing machine with one instruction, one mandate, one decree in mind – EXPRESS, HOT, EXTRA HIGH TUMBLE DRY.

This way, I know that I can wash a lotta stuff (EXPRESS) in multiple loads, decontaminating (HOT) as I go, and toss out those stubborn germs that try to hang on (EXTRA HIGH DRY) during the final process.

Like today. Everyone in my circle of people has been sick with horrific upper respiratory contagions. (Not my Mom, thank God. But grandkids, kids, in-law kids, husband, me – yes.)

Enter this digital key with each load…

In that spinning little barrel as I write are a pair of my delicate yoga pants, 2 100% cotton tanks top (ones I love, by the way), 3 pairs of nice running socks, 2 flannel pajama sets and 2 headbands.

I’ll take my chances.

Sorry, Mom.

This laundress is on a germ roll (as in roll out of that spinning barrel, you nasty creatures.)

Hopefully, soon I’ll be back to that nice daughter who follows all laundering directions.








About Audrey

Audrey McClelland has been a digital influencer since 2005. She’s a mom of 5 and shares tips on her three favorite things: parenting, fashion and beauty. She’s also a Contemporary Romance Author.

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